This is the part where you need to be honest and open to not only yourself, but to others as well. Once you have considered what you want, make it clear to others what you’re after so that there’s no confusion. It might be those in your own generation, it might not be, it could be anyone and from anywhere. From there, you’ll need to consider the type of people that you’re attracted to. You might be looking for a long term relationship, or you might be looking for someone to date because you want companionship and friendship. Due to this, and the ability to meet many people in rapid succession, you need to be focused on what it is that you’re after when it comes to dating, and ensure that you’re connecting with like-minded people. The explosion of technology has made it easier to connect with people and develop new and unique social circles.
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As a retired clinical psychologist with nearly 30 years of experience, I have seen it all, and I have compiled a list of ideas that might make dating and the search for love just that little bit easier. Many of the dating articles that are written for mature heterosexual men, will work for mature gay men, but it must be acknowledged that we have some unique considerations and points to consider as we traverse through the mature quest for love. This article is dedicated to the baby boomers/mature men looking for relationships and love whether that be for a new relationship, or even your first relationship. In a world of technology and dating applications such as Grindr, Scruff, Manhunt and craigslist, you can find exactly what you’re after and you can choose to go after it. You can be perfectly content avoiding the relationships and other people and be satisfied with your erotic toys and gay porn collection. You don’t have to be in a long term relationship, you don’t have to have a boyfriend, or a fuck buddy or any of those things. This could be the result of many reasons including the retaining of your independence, just come out of a relationship or lost your partner and you’re simply not up for the complexities and challenges of a long term relationship and that’s all well and good. A lot of men aren’t looking for love, and long term relationships or even interested in dating. We’ll preface this article by saying that this is primarily a guide of sorts for men looking for long term love, dating and relationships. You might not quite be near my years, but you certainly have more years than others. If you’re reading this, I will assume that you’re an older and mature gay male and that you’re single and looking for love. We adopt some of their likes and dislikes, we form new ways of thinking as we experience new things. I was impressionable of sorts, and I’m of the belief that with every partner we go through, we change. I went through men that, despite only staying in my life for a few months, would profoundly change my outlook and life.
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I went through boyfriends, lovers and partners. We stood, and we held hands, and we cried into the night, memorialising those who had passed with parties, and drugs. I watched my friends passing and disappearing, social networks fractured and fear running rampant through our lives. I lived through the HIV/AIDS crisis in Australia during the 80s. This event now occurs annually after being named the Sydney Gay and Lesbian Mardi Gras parade. We did not have the same legal rights as what we do now. That night, around 50 of my friends, my brothers and sisters were arrested. I wasn’t in that march, but that night I held my boyfriend’s hand and we smiled. The march was in recognition of an ‘International Homosexual Solidarity Day’ and it was a demonstration against the sexual repression of Queer people in both Australia and other countries around the world. I was 26 years old when several hundred people marched down George Street in Sydney on Sunday the 24th June, 1978.
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It was a rough time growing up in Sydney during that period where the public sentiment was one of resentment. Those years hardened my resolve and solidified my personality and I am more than thankful for those years. I have many fond memories of that time, and despite the chaos, uncertainty and the fear that presided over the time I wouldn’t change it for the world. I discovered my homosexuality during my teens during a period of Australian history of which the Queer Rights Movement was just being formed, and I was there for its formative years.
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Born in 1952 I currently have over six decades of experience when it comes to living.